#008: Expectations Of Success vs. The Reality Of Your Business

TPN Podcast Episode #008: Expectations Of Success vs. The Reality

 
 
 

 

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

👉 Start The Profitable Practice Free Course Here

👉 Register For The Free 5 Day Training Here

 


 

Episode Summary:

You need to EXPECT that there is going to be a learning curve for doing anything new, especially in your business.

Nothing has gone wrong when it isn't easy right away.

That is reality.

The REALITY of being the boss, and working with clients, and growing your practice is that it's not going to be comfortable a majority of the time.

In fact, it feels like crap a whole lot to take risks and be the boss.

No one tells you this. Especially business coaches. It's like there's an unspoken agreement in the business universe that if you do things "right" it isn't really that hard and you don't have to struggle.

And that's a lie.

Ask any successful business owner and they will tell you that there is always struggle and it's totally worth it.

Let's get into it and talk more about what some of those common expectations are and then, of course, what the actual reality is so you can avoid feeling disappointed when you find yourself smack dab in the middle of reality, too.

 

Action Items from this episode:

If you want to take this to the next level, make a list of the expectations that your clients have about the process of working with you and getting results in their health.

What do they expect it to be like?
How do they expect to feel?
What do they expect to think?
How do they expect others in their life to behave?

Get really detailed on these expectations from their point of view.

Then go through each of those expectations and write out what the reality is.

How does it actually work?
What do they actually feel like?

Maybe it's the same, maybe it's not. Maybe the reality is even BETTER than they expect it to be. That's entirely possible.

When you see this in black and white, you'll be able to talk about those results in a new way that excites them about the possibilities that are available to them and also normalizes the reality which is it might not be exciting all the time. And nothing has gone wrong. It's not a problem.

 



Transcript:

Note: The transcription below was provided for your convenience. Please excuse any typos or mistakes the automated service made in translation.

0:01
Welcome back, my friend. Before we get into today's topic and do a major reality check on what is actually like to be a profitable holistic health practitioner right now, right here in 2021. As I'm recording this, I want to take a second to mention two important things. One, if you're listening to this in November 2021, when it's being released, I'm hosting a free five day training in a few weeks that you want to participate in, so that you can start the new year in 2022. With money in the bank and lots of momentum in your business. The training is called Create 10 dream clients in the next 60 days. And that's exactly what you will do when you learn what we are going to be doing over our five days together 10 new dream clients in 60 days, like I said, this training is totally free, but you need to be registered to get the links to attend. So again, if you're listening to this before December 6, sign up for the free training right now, at Build a Profitable practice.com forward slash clients. If you are listening to this after the training has already happened, which will happen for many people, because these episodes will be up for years and years, don't stress because you can get on demand access to the full five days of teaching inside my paid program called the profitable nutritionist. As soon as you join the program, this is kind of how I work a few times a year I teach a big training like the one coming up in a few weeks. And then afterwards, the recordings get taken down. So you don't have access from the free training anymore. And then they are only available inside the program after that. The reason I do it this way is that I don't teach fluff. Like I hate that I hate when you sign up for something free. And it's just like fluffy garbagey stuff that you can't actually use. I don't do that I go deep on the exact strategies and tools that I teach in my paid program. So this is actual paid content that people pay for and get great results from. It's not an overview, or a thinly veiled sales pitch of any type teach actual content from my program, you learn something valuable, that will make you real money, and you get a taste of what the program is like. Then if you want more of it, of course, you can join the profitable nutritionist program, and you get bigger results even faster. Which brings me to my second reminder of the day, which is this actually a great segue. So here's the second reminder to get notified about resources like free upcoming trainings, and webinars and classes. And when the doors are open for enrollment in my program, because they are not open all the time, you have to be receiving emails from me, just plain and simple. I'm gonna put it out there just like this, you have to be getting my emails. Depending on how new you are to my work, let me just give you an idea of how I do business, I put the majority of my focus and brainpower into the emails that I send out. That includes my free course emails, my weekly teaching emails that get sent out once a week that everybody on my email list gets, it's like all emails in my world. I don't post on social media, you will never see me doing reels on Instagram, because I long ago deactivated my account, it's just emails for me. And I would argue maybe it should be just emails for you, too, I'm just saying. So even if you're an avid listener to this podcast, you won't always get real time updates like the one I'm taking the time to do right now. Because I record these in advance and sometimes timelines change. So I wanted to remind you, I always send valuable, helpful emails every single week, and those emails will have all of the information, always timely about what is coming up, and enrollment in the program and all that jazz. So to do that, you go to build a profitable practice.com and enter your email address anywhere that it asks for it. Or you can start the free course at Build a Profitable practice.com forward Slash Free. Now I have given you a lot of links to go to. And I know that you can always do that when you're listening to a podcast and you're driving or you're working out or whatever you're doing right now. So just know that those are also linked up in the show notes for this episode. So that was a lot. That was a lot to chat about.

4:08
Before we even get started with today's episode, but I thought it was a good time to kind of catch up and let you know what's coming up in the next few weeks around here. Today's topic, which I'm really loving that we get to touch on, because it's something that comes up a lot in my program actually here. I'll give you a little teaser of that. So inside my paid program, we do live coaching every single week where I jump on with members and they bring whatever they're struggling with and we coach on it live group style where other members get to watch that coaching being done and then apply it to their business just so so juicy because if you've never seen or experienced group coaching done really well you may not realize this, but what happens is people bring problems that they have that they're experiencing. And you may not even know that this is something that is happening for you too, because we can't always see what's going on in our own situation, right. So someone will bring a circumstance or some sort of mind drama that they're having, and get coached on it. And you realize, oh my gosh, I didn't realize that that is something that is affecting me affecting my business affecting my thoughts affecting my clients, affecting my health, whatever it is, it's like a magical light bulb turns on, and illuminates all these deep thoughts in your brain, that you just accepted. The way that things would always be and the way they've always been, until someone else brings it up, and you see them get coached on it, you realize, holy cow, I thought it was the only one that thought that or I thought it was totally normal. And now I can change my thoughts around it. So we do I use the word thoughts a lot, I use the word brain a lot, because we coach on mindset, a ton. We also do a lot of specific strategy and all that too. So when I talk about my program, I talk about coaching. That's what I'm talking about. We do live coaching every week. And this topic that we're going to talk about today comes up a lot. In fact, the members in my program, always laugh about this and say to each other, because they know what I'm going to ask when a certain question will come up, they know exactly what I'm gonna say. And they laugh about it. And what I say is, but is that even a problem. And then we're going to like, go back to the central theme throughout this entire episode. Because most concerns that we have in our business about things going wrong things not working, and what we really freak out about, like what our big issues are, typically aren't even a problem. We're gonna talk all about that today. So anyway, I'm calling this episode expectations versus reality. But you can also think of it if you want to as the is this even a problem episode. And that's a good tip for business in general, because you need to expect that there's going to be a learning curve, for doing anything new, especially in your business. Now, owning a business might be new for you, or just doing new things in your business moving to the next level in your business and trying something new. So it can be like a micro new thing, or it can be macro, like business in general is new. Just expect that there's going to be a learning curve, there's going to be a period of time when it's very uncomfortable, very unfamiliar. And it seems like everything is going wrong, does it mean it necessarily is but our brains really tell us this, so nothing has gone wrong, most of the time, it's just reality. I'm gonna let you marinate in that for a second reality versus our expectations is what we're talking about today. The reality of being a boss, and working with clients, and growing your practice, which is a business, that means you're a CEO, my friend, how fun is that? The reality of that circumstance is that it's just not going to be comfortable most of the time. It's really not. In fact, it feels like crap a whole lot. Nobody tells us this, especially business coaches, there's like this unspoken agreement in the business universe, that if you do things, right, it isn't really that hard. And you don't have to struggle, if you just do it this way, will minimize the struggle, it will be less uncomfortable. It's not really that hard. It's such a lie, isn't it? If you ask any successful or probably unsuccessful, for that matter, business owner, they will tell you there's always struggle. And it's worth it. This is the prevailing theme from the entrepreneurs that I know and I am surrounded by a lot of them in my business and professionally. Everybody talks about it, we talk about how much challenge there is to make a business work and how worthwhile it is. Because along the way, you become the person that does these hard things, and make something so cool. But it's not easy. And it's this thought that it should be easy. That is a lie. That is an expectation, not a reality, my friend.

8:46
Know what I teach about business is that it is simple. And it is it can be it should be. But that's not the same as easy. It's not the same as comfortable. Simple. Yes. Totally comfy, and steady with no roller coaster of mental drama. No, that is not what I'm saying. Our brains don't approach new situations and growth, and increasing our capacity for discomfort without experiencing emotions that suck sometimes, like it's just part of the deal. So we go back to the original phrase I talked about, which is Is this even a problem? If you don't want to go to work on Monday morning. For example, I don't know who would ever feel this way. But if you don't want to go to work on Monday morning, because your to do list is really long. And you're feeling nervous, for example, about a prospective client that you have a call with and you start having some serious imposter syndrome. You just want to shut your office door and pretend it's not there and throw in a few loads of laundry instead, purely hypothetical, if that were to happen. Is it even a problem? No, it's just part of the deal. It's uncomfortable sometimes. And it's hard and you have to figure out how to get work done even when your brain has given you all the reasons to do anything else. Everything else all of the other things What it doesn't feel good? Is that even a problem? Or is that just part of being a business owner, just like having a business, I would just say it's part of it. I don't know a ton about being an elite athlete. And I almost laugh as I even say that out loud to you. If you know me personally, you know that I couldn't be further from it. But I imagine that if you are an elite athlete, and every single day, you're training to be better and better and better in your sport, that it doesn't always feel like the thing you want to do. I would imagine, you don't go run 10 or 20 miles a day, every single day thinking this is the best. Exactly my favorite thing I wanted to do right now would imagine that sometimes you're really sore, you don't feel good, you're having an off day. And that's just part of the deal. Should keep going. And you do it anyway. Because your goals are bigger than that problem. Or is it even a problem? Hmm, maybe it's not a problem. Maybe that's just part of it. Right? expectations versus reality, the expectation is that it should always feel good, or something is wrong. Like you'll always be in alignment, this is another thing I see is I, I just I want to be in alignment, or it will just flow when the time is right, it'll just flow. Oh, you don't know exactly what to do and say at all times, doesn't always come easily. It's just not, it's not always gonna flow. But that's the reality of it, our expectation is that business will always grow, it'll be very linear, each month will be better than the last month, or it'll come really naturally. These are some more expectations. But as you can imagine, reality is different. It doesn't always feel good, you will doubt yourself a lot, like a lot. You'll want to just crawl under the covers some days and not even do it. And your best plans will not turn out the way that you thought that they would, you'll have the best idea ever, this happens like weekly, okay, you'll have the best idea ever. And it'll be a total flop. You'll waste time. And you'll feel like your business is a hot mess, sometimes be super uncomfortable. Facing your inadequacies and your failures head on. And watching them happen. It's it's reality. But here's what else is reality. Your business doesn't have to make you feel good all the time. That's not the purpose of your business. The purpose of your business is to help people solve the problems that they're struggling with, because you do know how to do that, and they are struggling. That's the purpose of your business. That other purpose of your business is to provide financial freedom and flexibility to you and your family. It's a big deal. That's the purpose of your business, not to make you feel good is to help other people and to pay your bills. That's what your business does. You don't have to feel great all the time for those things to happen. In fact, you will feel way better when you expect that you're going to experience discomfort. And then it's not a panic situation. When it happens. I think about myself as a new business owner in my early 20s. I started out selling real estate. Actually, let's just take a moment I was going to apply to the FBI Academy. And I couldn't do that until I was 23 years old, but I graduated college at 22. So I had a year where I needed to do something before I could go to Quantico, this or so was the plan. But as you can imagine, didn't happen because I started selling real estate somebody told me to sell real estate. And because in your early 20s, when you don't know any better, because you're a tiny baby, you do things like this. I hadn't even bought a house. I didn't know anything about the process. Like where were the grown ups?

13:39
I don't know. But anyway, someone told me that to do this. I did it. Ignorance is bliss. I just did these things. Like I just did them. I failed a ton. I didn't question much about it. I felt like a total imposter. Of course, I actually was an imposter. This wasn't even imagined. I don't think I think we can all agree that a 22 year old selling a house that has never even bought a house is an imposter. But he figured it out. And pretty soon I was really good at it. And I got even better. And I got even more clients. And I had other people that wanted to work for me. And eventually I had my own brokerage by the age of 26. I had my own brokerage I was pregnant with my first daughter, Oh, I'm tired even thinking about it. That's not the point of this episode. The point is that I didn't even know what I didn't know. And that was great. And that helped me so much. But I think it's harder when we do think that we know how things are going to go. I guess my point of that story is that when we have the expectation that things should be easy or something has gone wrong, then when it's not easy, and it never will be we think something has gone wrong, but it has it we just want to be more comfortable. We're more cautious when you're in your early 20s. And you don't have very many bills. And you're just waiting to go to the FBI Academy, for example, was like whatever I'm gonna try this and I don't know, I have no idea what I'm doing. I think I'm really bad at this, but maybe I'll get better And oh my gosh, I just made a check. And that was a lot of money. I want to do that, again, these were the thoughts. Ignorance is bliss, like I said, but if we can get back to that place, we can just go, oh, I can do it anyway, I'm just super uncomfortable, no idea what I'm doing. But I'm still gonna try, I could be very helpful. It's when we expect that there should be notice comfort. And then we panic when it comes up. Right, I guess that's the point there long way around to the actual point, which is expecting things to be totally comfortable and never have to grow, is what creates panic for a lot of people's businesses. And I just don't want that for you. One of my favorite phrases, and I don't even know who to give credit for, but I'm sure it's from a military book, a sidebar, I love learning about military strategy and people's experiences in the military. That's just like an interest of mine. So a lot of things that I will quote, come from this fascination. Anyway, prepare for the worst, but hope for the best. Great quote, right, prepare for the worst, but hope for the best. I love this as a way to approach expectations and reality in your business. Prepare to be uncomfortable and feel shitty, because the learning curve is real, and you probably will a lot of the time. And then it's not so bad. Actually, you feel less of the intense rollercoaster of emotions you feel way more confident, way more calm and motivated as time goes on. Because you're not panicking every time those negative emotions come up thinking that something is wrong, and you should stop, prepare for the worst emotions, but hope for the best. And then what really happens is it actually is better for you. For example, expect your clients to flake on you, or to ask for a refund when it gets hard for them. Just be ready. Be ready to evaluate the circumstances when this happens, and learn from it for next time. Because it will happen. Everybody has this at some point. Expect it getting back to your emails, for example, as far as marketing goes, expect it to be hard to write, copy, if you've never done it before, don't quit because it's not natural. Or you don't immediately sell out your offer from sending a few emails. The reality is, it takes practice to sell with copy takes practice to sell period. But you have time. There's no rush, just expect it to be a process. Instead of expecting that your emails are going to just be amazing right away. Just expect this could be a process. Nothing's gone wrong. This is another example of is it even a problem. I recently had a member of my program getting coached on our live call a few weeks ago. And she was really concerned that her sales process wasn't working. We had the best coaching around this, because she was very convinced that her sales process wasn't working. So we broke it down.

17:44
I asked a lot of questions about exactly what the process was from a cold lead a stranger from the internet contacting her and booking a call and her getting on a call with them and explaining the pricing explaining her program all of this right, we got all the information. And at the end of it My question was, but is this even a problem? It wasn't a problem. She felt like it was a problem, because he wasn't getting the exact outcome she wanted yet. But really, don't get me wrong. There's always room for improvement and iteration. But really nothing had gone wrong. She was getting people booking calls, she was collecting a lot of data to work with so that she could tweak her process. And people weren't calling her people wanted to work with her. So Was there really a problem? No. Good example that came to mind. It's like, Is this even a problem? Probably not always room for improvement. But let's not freak out, right? The reality is that nothing ever works flawlessly the first time, even though that's our expectation, our expectation is we set up the system for this client set up the system, this is how it's supposed to go the system isn't working, I don't know what to do. Well, that's because there was an expectation that the system will just work flawlessly the first time. That's never gonna happen. The reality is, it never will ever, it's not a problem. It's just an opportunity to get better and better at what we're doing and evaluate each step along the way and tweak it, iterate, change, pivot a little bit here and there and make it better. Okay, hopefully that made sense for you. Here's another reality bomb, your business is a puzzle. Like one of those really cool puzzles. So I like to think about it with lots of pieces. Like you can't just sit down and do this puzzle one time and finish it. It's not gonna happen. It's a big one. But it's a super fun puzzle. It's totally yours. No one else is gonna ever have one that looks like this very different than anyone else's. And it's a work in progress, that you just get to figure out piece by piece. You don't have a box to look at to know exactly what it's gonna look like at the end. You have no idea no one does. But just putting one piece together at a time and figuring it out as you go, is what your business is. I don't know my brain kinda likes to have the visual of that. Maybe your associate but the expectation There's a time to kind of like take this puzzle analogy. It's an analogy or metaphor, I don't know, I'm a homeschool mom. But I don't know that, okay, I'm going to be honest, the expectation is that there's going to be a time when the puzzle is complete, and you're done with the puzzle, and you put the puzzle away. Again, and that's the expectation, like we're going to get there, wherever there is, is when the puzzle is complete, the business is done. But the reality is, that's not possible. And I would argue you wouldn't even want it to be, we need something to work on. And to work at and to think about and improve at and strive for that's, that's our human experience, we want to be better at things, we want to have something that we're working on. So when you embrace the uncertainty and possibility of your business as this puzzle that you get to keep working on, that's never really done. Your brain actually loves that, because it's hard, and it pushes you. This is all very confusing, because while your primitive brain will resist, and there are actually different parts of our brain. So I'm talking about your primitive brain that wants you to just stay as safe as possible and never take risks. That part of you, which has evolved for many, many millennia, will resist doing hard things. And it doesn't want you to take chances initially, but your prefrontal cortex, which is the part of your brain, that is highly evolved, and that can make decisions and plan for the future, that part that makes humans different than everything else. That part loves having this challenge of your business. And this puzzle that's never really figured out. And it loves figuring out how to improve it. Kind of cool, right? So the expectation is that it should be easy. And there should be a time when it's done. And you've arrived there and your business is done. But that's not real. The reality is, it's never done, and you really wouldn't want it to be, you get to keep getting better and better at it. Here's another expectation that I see people have, they expect to be really great at sales calls or console calls or marketing of any sort, even though they've never done them before. No, the reality is, you have to learn that you have to get some practice, you have to do some bad ones. Just like me selling real estate as a tiny baby in my early 20s had some bad, bad moments, where I knew that I had just biffed it so hard, and had to learn from those, it'd be really embarrassed and fix it and learn from it. Same thing in your health business, when you are having marketing calls for the first time or console calls, whatever you want to call them. Yeah, they can be a hot mess in the beginning, expect it, then be surprised if they're not right, but expect it to be a bit of a learning curve. Here's another one expect for other people in your life to be less than supportive of your new priorities, especially if they're used to having you all to themselves and having you take care of all their needs.

22:56
Nuff said. Expect that that could be a problem. Also expect to have moments of frustration with new technology or new processes like bookkeeping and taxes. If you've never done this before, just expect that that's going to be frustrating. Sometimes technology never works all the time. It always works none of the time, or it never works all the time you pick I don't know. But technology can be frustrating, right? Just expect that nothing's gone wrong. It doesn't mean you're terrible at it, does it mean that you'll never figure it out? The reality is that it's going to be frustrating. Sometimes that's okay. Nothing has gone wrong. It's not a problem. Expect to have clients that are really difficult, and that seem to have a knack for zeroing in on all of your deepest insecurities and pushing all of your buttons. expect this. Learn from these clients, you'll get better at detachment and enforcing personal boundaries when you work with clients like this. If you don't take it personally, when you have them. Right, but don't assume it's a problem. Remember, your clients are a mirror for your beliefs. So you should expect that your clients especially in the beginning, are going to show you exactly what you need to work on most for yourself. They will be a mirror for it. They will show you exactly what lessons you need to learn. That's the reality. We all have this happen. Expect it. I don't know why no one else talks about this. Like it's not a problem when this happens. When you have really difficult clients that just seem to hone in on your deepest darkest fears. In question them, that happens. It's reality. It's okay. I'm kind of having fun with this episode. I'm sure you could tell I keep giggling and just laughing as I'm going through some of these thoughts because I'm recalling myself making these mistakes and thinking that everything was falling apart when it really wasn't and everything was fine and I'm just recalling some of my worst flops talk about them with you. So trip down memory lane. As far as expectations never being the same as reality. I'm having fun with this one. Okay, next expectation I want you to have expect that others will go faster. This is a big one. I see a lot of people comparing themselves to our colleagues and their colleagues and their shiny perfected Instagram feed, and then feeling like they're behind, because they're seeing other people that are going faster, or that seemed more successful. But here's the reality, no one gets a shortcut around the struggles of running their own business and learning these things. No one gets set shortcut, you have no idea what is going on behind the scenes of anyone that seems really successful anyway, I hope for their sake, that they are really successful, that they're helping a lot of people that they're doing amazing, that's my hope. But I've also seen a lot of practitioners that look really polished online, and they aren't actually making any money. So I have to say, you know, sometimes things aren't as they seem. My hope is that it is though I want to see more and more and more people just killing it, helping people get healthy. That is my hope that elevates our entire industry and is the best case scenario. But sometimes being flashy, and looking a certain way online, doesn't actually reflect the business. And then there's people like me that you can barely find online that have a very good business, right? So the expectation is that you should be at the same level of success as everyone on Instagram or everyone you're seeing on social media, for example. That's problematic, because we don't really even know what success means or what how to even define that. And the reality is, is that everyone is starting at a different point when they start their business. And it's, first of all, it's not even easier for them anyway, everyone goes through the struggles. But you still don't know what they started with. Had they run a business before? Had they done this before? Did they already have a foundation they were building off of? We don't know. It's so counterproductive to try to compare our progress with someone else's progress, like our journey to someone else's journey. What's the quote about don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle, something along those lines, that that makes so much sense. But I see this so often, when it comes to compare and despair, comparing two people online despairing that we aren't there, like,

27:17
we're not there yet. They're going faster. And it all seems like it's a problem. But it's not. It's not the expectation is that everyone has the same skills and will go at the same speed. The reality is, that was never going to happen. And we need to just shut it down. Right? It's totally okay. We're running your own race mixing all of the metaphors here of this entire episode, I hope you enjoy it. But to add to that one, though, the expectation that you're either good at business, or you're not is kind of the thought that I see that fuels that compare and despair. So I want to touch on this a little bit. This thought like, like, it's just something that you're good at, or you aren't, I hear people say this, like, I'm just not good at business. Like I love helping people. And I love what I do when I'm working with clients, but I'm just not good at the business side of things. Like that's just something that you're born with, like you you have brown eyes, or and then you're good at business. But if you're born with blue eyes, you just can't do I do you have to go work at Starbucks. Oh, it's not like that this is a skill. The reality is it's a skill that people learn at some point. And that's what you're learning. By listening to this podcast, I hope that you're getting the gist here that these are all things that you just learn how to do over time, and anybody who's successful in their business has just learned it a little bit sooner, no big deal. expectation is that it should just come easy. The reality is, it's a skill. Being a profitable business owner is a skill that you learn. But expect your brain to have to do some work to catch up with your successes too. So I've talked so far about these expectations about how things should be easy, and how sometimes they're not much of the time, they're not as easy as it seems like they will be nothing has gone wrong. But also when we do have success, we have to talk about this, our brain will also make that a problem. Success intolerance is a very, very real thing. Now I have a book I want to mention here called The Big Leap. If you haven't read it, it's a dandy. I think the author's name, I should have actually looked this up before I mentioned it here on this episode. Gay Hendricks I believe is the name of the author of this book, The Big Leap. What he talks about in the book is how we have basically a threshold for success. He basically calls it your upper limit, and then I'm going to define that as your comfort zone. So when you hit your upper limit, that's when things get real wild because your brain cannot handle going outside of the comfort zone successfully. So this is like making more money than you've ever made before. You'll have an upper limit of what your brain thinks is a reasonable and acceptable amount of money for you to make, and anything above that, it will really try to sabotage and bring you back down to this upper limit unless you're aware of this happening. That's fantastic to understand, especially since we talk about business and money in this podcast. But also, this happens in our help, like with weight loss, he

30:20
talks a lot about weight loss examples in the book and about how we have a, quote unquote setpoint. I'm paraphrasing here wildly. But this is what I recall from when I read the book, we have a set point for what our weight is that we think we can sustain, and will often stay at that weight for a long time, even if we lose weight, then we'll gain it back to the point where our brain was happy and understood that this was the upper limit. This was what could be expected. And we shouldn't go lower than that, or maybe higher for some people. But I would say for most people lower than that is very uncomfortable. Because our brain doesn't think that it can maintain it. Right. So this, this is a great book. I'm like completely bastardizing what the actual point of the book is, but what I took away from it was the upper limits. I think that's so interesting, because it kind of melds into success and tolerance. And what I see with clients and what I've definitely experienced myself at certain times, the expectation of success is that once you're making money in your business, it'll always go up, and you'll never struggle like money will solve the problems. That is a lie. Spoiler that is a lot. The reality is that your brain is going to freak out when you're successful, just like it did when you weren't because of this issue about upper limits, and self sabotage and all sorts of things that happen here. But if you expect that more money in your business bank account is going to alleviate those shitty feelings and those shitty thoughts, then you're going to be very disappointed. I want to talk about this a little bit, I have an entire module in my program. In fact, that's dedicated to this exact reality, because it will always come up. When you do achieve your initial goals. Here's what happens. When you achieve those initial goals. You set them, they seem lofty, you achieve them. And then you're making money, the money that was your goal, right? Then your brain will freak out. And it will say that was a fluke, we can't repeat it and it's not sustainable. That's the reality, I promise, it's going to be a version of one of those three thoughts. And if you don't know that those thoughts are coming, and they take you by surprise, you will like many people do wrongly assume that you have to change everything. Because your brain is telling you it's a fluke, it's not sustainable, we can't do this. And you will go back instead of doing what's working and making it better. And making it more consistent and more sustainable, your brain will tell you to go back and change everything. This is when people change their niche for no reason. This is when people change their offer, and tried to introduce a new offer, do all sorts of crazy things change the pricing for no reason. This is a real thing. So we talked about it a lot success and tolerance and your upper limit. It's a big deal. Because you wherever you go, there you are with your human brain that has thoughts. And we don't always need to believe them, but they will definitely be there. Like I said, those thoughts are going to be it's not sustainable. It's a fluke, and we can't repeat it. Ah, so frustrating. So even when you get to the point where you're doing the things that you wanted to do, you're making the money you wanted to, you're still gonna be uncomfortable, okay, that's the reality, the assumption, of course, being that money is going to fix everything. And as soon as we're making enough money, it's all going to be great. The reality is that you're still going to have your human brain that has a lot of thoughts about what is and is impossible for you. And it's not going to always feel good, even with more money in the bank accounts not always going to feel good. So I want everyone to just expect those thoughts. The point of bringing this up, in this episode in particular is just so that you know that those thoughts will be coming and you don't you're not surprised by them. You just say oh,

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there you are. I knew you were coming. There you are. And you don't make a bunch of big changes in your business from this place of thinking that it's a fluke, or it's not sustainable. Don't ever, ever do that. Those thoughts are gonna come going to be uncomfortable, even when you're successful. It's totally okay. It's fine. Nothing has gone wrong. I'll say it again. But is it even a problem? No, it's not a problem. It's just totally normal. That is the overarching theme of this episode is most of the time nothing has gone wrong. Okay, we just had a little bit of a disparity between the expectation for how things would go and then the reality of what actually happens. That's okay. No big deal. The only problem is that disparity between the expectations and the reality, but otherwise, I am sure that things are going fine in your business and you're just experiencing all of these same normal ups and downs, entrepreneur rollercoaster that we all go through. That's my that's my like, tie it up with a happy thoughts bow of this episode is it's totally normal. We are all doing the same thing. We're all doing different versions of the same thing and that's okay. It's fine. Your business can be simple, it's not going to be easy, ever. That part's a lie. But it can be simple, right? And the way that you do that is keep it really simple in your mind. And know that these thoughts are totally normal, kind of anticipate what's coming and know that the mental growth you're going to go through, as you keep going, even when things don't feel great. That is what's going to get you to the ultimate success in your business. That's what's required. As a business owner, that keeps going and helps a lot of people. Just so good, right? Same thing goes for your clients. Think about this through their lens, right? If you want to take it to the next level, once you to make a list of expectations, think about your clients make a list of expectations that those clients or future clients or your dream clients have about the process of working with you? What are the expectations that they have? What are the expectations? Like to take it even a little bit further? What are the expectations that they have about getting the results that they want in their health? seriously ask these questions, I highly, highly recommend getting out a piece of paper making a list. What do they expect it to be like? How do they expect to feel? What do they expect to think along the way? How do they expect others in their life to behave towards these changes they're going to make in their health? get really detailed on these expectations, from the point of view of your client can be really insightful, but so good, what are their expectations? And then, when you have a really juicy, meaty list that's full of all kinds of expectations that clients will have go through each of those expectations, and write out what the reality is, how does it actually work? What do they actually feel like? What are they actually thinking, maybe it's the same, and maybe it's not, maybe you might find the reality is even better than they expect it to be? It's totally possible. But when you can make a list, write it out black and white, you're going to be able to talk about these results in a totally new way. That's why I want you to do this exercise and get into the brain of your clients. And think about how you can talk about these results in a new way that's going to excite them about the possibilities that are available to them. And it's also going to normalize the reality, which is you might not be exciting all the time, maybe that's the conclusion you come to is that people have the expectation that they're gonna feel so good all the time, and maybe they're not going to, and normalizing that might be a really good message, sometimes nothing has gone wrong, it's not a problem. Here's how my clients typically think that this experience is going to go and here's what it actually is like, that's very normal, like spitballing with you just kind of fill in the blanks of what that would sound like in a marketing message or in a sales conversation. But isn't that a really, really interesting way to think about marketing to your clients through their expectations, and then the reality of the experience, just like I am for you right now, I can tell you all about the expectations people have about their business, we could talk about it for hours. And then what the reality is, as I've seen it and experienced it myself, and I've seen hundreds and hundreds of other practitioners experienced the same thing. So valuable. So I'm gonna leave you with one more cliche phrase before we go, because I don't think we've had quite enough in this episode. I think one more would really, really seal the deal. Here's this great phrase, I

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love it. You either win, or you learn. You may have heard this before. Again, I don't know who to give credit to, but you either win or you learn kind of ties this all together, right? The expectation is that you win every time or something has gone wrong. That's the overarching theme of our business, right? So that everything is going to work, you're going to win every time, or else there's a problem. But that's a terrible way to approach our business, or life in general, or for your clients to approach their health transformation. Because we know that it's way more likely that you won't win every time. We know this, we have to know this. So why do we think it's going to be any different in the future? I don't know. But we know this, you probably won't win most of the time in your business especially. But nothing has gone wrong. It's totally expected that you just win or you learn, you didn't win. Great, you definitely learned you learned what to tweak for next time you learned what didn't work, so you don't do it again. You learned what did work so that you can repeat it and go all in. That's learning. Instead of expecting to win every time expect to learn that's the big theme on this one. And then when in doubt, you ask yourself and your clients, but is it even a problem? Then that will really bring you back to the baseline of wha has anything even really gone wrong here? Or am I just having a brain and thinking that this is all crashing down and really there's not even a problem? Most of the time, that is the case. So that's it for today, my friend. Remember if you're listening to this in real time you want to register for the free upcoming training that starting on December 6. Again, you can register right now at Build a Profitable practice.com forward slash clients. But if you're listening after the live training date has passed, no big deal just make sure that you are getting my build a profitable practice emails so that you're up to date on all events and then you don't miss the next training as it comes up. You can go to build a profitable practice.com and sign up for the free course to be added to the email list or click on a link below in the show notes for this episode, and it'll bring you right to where you need to go. Alright, that is it for today. Have a wonderful, wonderful week.

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